Are You Suffering From Imposter Syndrome?

Imposter syndrome is that niggling feeling that your achievement is due to sheer of luck or it’s a fluke so you downplay it and when you receive praise and compliments, you feel like a fraud; a feeling of the idea that you did not work as hard as everyone’s praising you for. The term was coined by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in the 70’s, they observed a bunch of high achieving women and when they spoke to them, they told Pauline and Suzanne that they felt inadequate in their career or in general.  Imposter syndrome does not discriminate and can take form in anyone. You might have experienced imposter syndrome and/or currently experiencing this feeling and not known what it’s called.

There are 5 types of imposter syndrome:

 

1.The perfectionist- The perfectionist is someone who focuses on getting everything meticulous. If it’s not 100% they tend to feel like their world has fallen apart. As a result of this, a perfectionist feels like a failure.

 

2. The expert- The pressure that the expert puts on to themselves is the idea that they must know anything and everything. They need to be tooled up with information and knowledge even if its insignificant/unnecessary information. When they feel a lack of knowledge on their part, they feel a sense of shame and beat themselves up because they believe they should have known.

 

3. The soloist– The soloist believes to get anything done correctly or on time it needs to be done by themselves. This type of person reframes from asking for help because they see it as a sign of weakness.

 

4. The natural genius– The natural genius holds on to the idea that they need to know something straight away. The thought of taking a while to understand a skill or subject is not apart of this type of person thought pattern.

 

5. The super person– Often referred to as the superwomen/man or student. This type of person judges their ability on how many things they can take on without asking for any help. Their idea of competence is to juggle everything all at once, hence the name.

 

 

I have been feeling the perfectionist type for the past month hence the lack of blog post. I went into a thought loop of if my post is not 100% perfect then there is no point in putting it out and I would feel like I’ve let you all down. It one I am still battling with but over the past week or so, I am learning to let go and trust. Trust that through my work people will hear my message, it doesn’t have to be perfect because there is no such thing!

 

As it’s a new month, I would like you to promise yourself this December that you will celebrate every success you achieve this month, you will actively seek to learn something new and  if you need extra support-ASK! people are there to support you.

 

Live a harmonious life x

 

 

It’s Time To Switch Up Your Daily Routine

From the time we wake up in the morning, we are straight into a routine that is a habit for us. The way we shower, the way we get dressed and put on certain items of clothing first and how we prepare to leave the house is a continuous routine. We are so conditioned to this routine that it’s second nature to us, we don’t have think about it because we’ve done it a million times before.

Routines can get a bit boring after a while and sometimes you need a change, so what would it be like if you reverse your chronological order of putting clothes on or changing the order you begin in the bathroom.

How would that make you feel?

So, I took it upon myself to do this fun experiment. If you know me one thing I always do while listening to music is, I always shuffle songs on my phone, I could be anywhere, with anyone and I will continuously shuffle to find the right song. Now, there is nothing, in particular, I am looking for, it’s just anything that grabs my attention at that moment, I will settle for. When doing this fun experiment instead of falling back into my old routine of shuffling songs, I was open to each song that blessed my ears and listening to it with full attention. Turned out, the songs I were skipping, were actually pretty good.
Another example is on my journeys to frequent places I tend to cross the road at a certain point because it’s become a natural habit for me. This time I decided to cross the street at a different point on the road. Previously, if I ever tried to do this before it would freak me out. but, I just said what’s the worst that can happen. I am still going to get to my destination even if I cross the street later or earlier.
After a long day, I sat down and reflected on why I did this. This experiment made me realise:

• Change is not a bad thing and the more we embrace it, the more it has a positive effect on us.
• It’s ok to switch up your routine from time to time, as long as the main goal is in focus.
• And lastly, the amount of overthinking we do when it comes to doing something new, resist us from stepping out of our the comfort zone

 

What will you change this week?

 

 

Stay Grounded X

HOW TO DETOX THE MIND

Earlier this week I did a post about detoxing and I left it pretty open in how you might want to detox.
In this post, I want to go into more depth about how to detox your mind. The brain is the most complex organ and with that, our mind is repeatedly filled with knowledge, our ego, unnecessary things, trauma, memories, and many more complicated topics. And we allow our minds to take over and exaggerate what we think, to the point we start to believe the stories we tell ourselves. A habit that most of us do, including myself is to keep all of our worries and anxieties cooped up in our mind, out of fear of being vulnerable or feeling uncomfortable, so we let it manifest in our head. This is how overthinking is formed and it plays a big role in how we perceive situations externally.

Now I don’t have all the answers to detoxing your mind, but I certainly know this; It starts and ends with you. Only you can regain the power in letting go of this limiting habit that has taken a toll on you.

Some useful ways and reminders in detoxing your mind for the better:

Speak to someone:
There is always support wherever you go but you won’t know that until you open up. Seek out the people in your life who you trust and tell them your anxieties and fears. You will feel much better when you’ve expressed how you feel.

• 

No quick fix:
Understand detoxing your mind is not a quick fix, you had years and years programming this belief in your brain and it won’t go overnight. But, by recognising these limiting qualities you have and spending time actively changing the story in your head to the point that you believe it, that’s when you will see a real difference.

The ego:
It’s your ego that is creating these false perceptions and realities that keep your brain working overtime. The ego has this thing where it tries to come up with this would of, should of solution and from that, you dwell on the past and try to change what has gone.

Write your worries down:
Writing down what is keeping you in a locked mindset enables you to take what is in your head and physically see it on paper. A place where you can separate your emotions and reflect on what you want to eliminate.

• 

Let go:
Let go of any trauma, past memories that no longer have a place in your mind. Allow that experience to help you move on by thanking the experience and letting it go with love

Remove external factors:
I always say this but if there is something in your physical space that no longer needs to be there. Get rid of it. This could be objects that remind you of something, people who you want to distance away from or move on. When your physical space is balanced so is your mind.

• 

Digital detox:
We are always on our phones and we get the most information from there but, all that information can actually be detrimental to our health if we are consuming the wrong stuff. Cut down on the things you consume via technology, this can be the people you follow on social media, social media as a whole or limiting your time on the most frequent technology you use.

Stay Grounded X

The Perks Of A Detox

A detox or a cleanse is all about lessening the amount of energy you put into something as it starts to have a negative effect on your mind, body, and soul. It’s a sign to release all the toxins that no longer uplift you. When we are caught up in the negative toxic state, we get unhappy, we start to compare ourselves to others and we suppress the person we truly are and before you know it you are in a complete rut.
Detox or cleanse is the step before you completely burn out, by stepping back and observing your patterns, you are able to alter the energy you put into something and turn it into something that makes you feel good.
Is there something in your life that perhaps you need to take a cleanse from, step back and observe what no longer uplifts you and start the process of removing it from your life.

Quote of the week: ”Find the ultimate balance that brings you inner peace” – The Grounded Tree

To view last weeks inspiration of the week click here

Take A Break

Inspiration of the week

Life is a continuous loop without a pause button. Scrambling to find a moment of peace where we are truly not doing anything, is harder to find than a needle in a haystack.
We need to find that button and hit pause immediately until we feel mindful to continue the loop again.
Taking a break can do wonders on our mental and physical health- If we just take some time out and not give our attention to outside work and focus on our wellbeing, we will begin to see the positive effect of peace.

This week is a moment to give yourself a break. Take off a morning or evening and let the mind decide what you want to do, go with the flow and see what you’re drawn too.

Quote of the week:  ”Just chill and do you”- Unknown

To view last weeks inspiration of the week click here

How I Organise My Life

• 

If you’re anything like me adulting can be tough at times. There are so many responsibilities, jobs and overall things you need to remember; and then you would end up forgetting what you needed to complete and the inevitable cycle happens once again.
It got to a point where I didn’t know what to do, so then I started to stick post-it notes around my room to help me remember but, they always end up disappearing and I couldn’t remember what I ever wrote down.

I felt like everything I tried didn’t work.
I had a little pep talk with myself and ask ‘’what can I do to feel more organised and how can I make it fun for me?’’

It was until I dedicated some time that I ended up finding a planner that suited me (I love anything that has quotes on it so this was perfect for me.)

Everything was going so well, I absolutely loved the planner and felt a sense of accomplishment and a bit of an organisation queen. Until I kept leaving the planner at home and felt myself slipping back into my old ways.

Then it hit me!! My phone is always by my side so why not record all my dates and reminders there.

So below is an example of how I organise my life:

*Due to privacy reasons I had to cover up names

An easy way to help navigate my life was to colour code. Each colour has specific category. There is-
Social- This includes social events, meet up’s with family and friends and birthdays
University- Any university work, meetings, deadlines
Work- Any work dates, meetings etc.
Gym-The days I go to the gym and what I do there
The grounded tree- Anything to do with the grounded tree

Now, I use both my planner and calendar in conjunction with each other. It’s great because if I forgot my book, I still have what I need right on my phone.

If you are trying to get organised, why not try out the calendar on your phone or if you’re old school and prefer something physical, why not invest in a diary. It’s really beneficial in the long run.

Stay Grounded X

9 Ways To Invest In Yourself

When was the last time you invested in yourself?

You might be thinking what do you mean investing in myself? I mean the investment where you spend some quality time by yourself and did not feel guilty about it. We are often frivolous to spend our time on others but when it comes to ourselves we lack the same enthusiasm. Perhaps one reason behind this could be because there is not enough time in the day or week for you to fully relax because they are always something that needs to be done.

In our bodies we produce endorphins, endorphins are the chemicals that are released in our bodies that cause us to feel good, by doing the things that nurture us we unknowingly release this chemical. As humans, we want to have this feeling on a daily, weekly and monthly basis. So why do we not do this often?   For me, I love sitting at home with the candles lit and I go down the rabbit hole of watching Youtube and Netflix or blogging, I love the process of writing a blog post and sharing my knowledge and experiences with you. That feeling of joy that we reap should always be our attitude towards investing in ourselves overall.

Spending quality time by yourself doesn’t have to be hours on end, it could be an hour to all day. Below I have some examples of how you can spend some quality time by yourself  tapping into the mind body and soul

 

 THE MIND

-Listen to a podcast to inspire your mind

-Write your thoughts and wishes in a journal

– Declutter your mind

THE BODY

-Go for a walk in nature (listening to the sounds around you, how do they make you feel)

-Exercise ( yoga, gym, kick boxing, pole fitness, horse riding etc)

-Cook yourself a nourishing 3 course meal

 

THE SOUL

-Explore your creative side

-Start that side hustle you’ve been putting off

-Learn a new skill by enrolling in a course

 

Do you know about the wellness wheel? This is a great way to focus on investing in yourself in all aspect of your life through the dimensions of wellness. To learn all about it click here

 

Stay Grounded X

How To Take Care Of Your Health

We have all been in the position where someone has asked you to do something and you know you should say no, but because you feel bad and feel on the spot, you do it anyway and before you know it, you are overthinking why you said yes to taking on more work.
As soon as you’re doing the work you notice that it’s affecting your sleep, your ‘me’ time and your health and really and truly you should have just said no.
Putting yourself first sounds like one rule you don’t even have to think about, it’s like of course, you have to put yourself first. However, it is easier said than done. When you are a person who wants to help others, you can end up entwined in other peoples lives and abandon yourself.

This was me recently and I learned the hard way. I was killing myself at work and accepting extra responsibilities here and there and slowly I was becoming ill, I thought it was something minor and it wouldn’t affect me so, I carried on with my responsibilities. Until I felt a shift in my health, I was becoming weak, weaker than normal and it didn’t feel right. I came home after work and that’s when my body crashed. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t stay awake, my body just gave up. Over a course of a week, I was able to regain my appetite and energy back and was back to my old self. What I learned from the experience was that if I put myself first and said no when taking on the extra responsibilities I would have not been as poorly as I was or poorly at all. I had to understand I am not a superhero, if I can’t do something someone else will, it’s that simple. My health physical and mental will always be a top priority when it comes to anything I invest myself in.

Below is a list of ways to invest in your health when you feel overwhelmed:

• Read a book
• Watch a series
• Talking to a loved one
• Have some ‘me’ time
• Turn off your phone
• Cook yourself a nice meal
• Go for a walk
• Exercise ( gym, kickboxing or running)
• Take each thing one at a time
• Take a good nap

This week I want you to be aware of the number of responsibilities you have and learn to say no to anything that applies more pressure on yourself. Learn to say no without feeling guilty. Remember your health is more important

 

Stay Grounded X

How To Take Action On Your Goals

The end of the year is fast approaching only 3months left, so you decide to look at your goals from the start of the year and you realise that either you’ve forgotten about one of the goals, the goal doesn’t resonate with you anymore or the goal is still a goal and you haven’t accomplished it yet. You then start to think what have I been doing throughout the year, have I made any changes to my life. Well, the answer is yes, although it might not have been the goals you wrote down at the start of the year, every day you are overcoming obstacles and fears that are changing you without you even knowing it.

Yet you still have those goals looming over you; fear not! because although we have 3 months left,  you have 103 days starting from today to turn those goals into a reality. The common reason behind why goals take longer and harder to become a reality is because we set an intention without any action, which means that we write down the goal without breaking down the steps in order to reach the goal.

For example, a goal can be to eat healthier.

How do you break down the steps in order to make this a reality? Below is an example of the actions you will take in order to reach the goal.

Look up healthy recipes online
Slowly cut down one at a time, snacks and junk food
Introduce more fruit and vegetables to my diet
Opt for a grilled version instead of fried
And so forth.

In order to leave this year on a high, start off by breaking down each goal that you haven’t achieved as of yet and start working towards making it a reality. It all starts now.

That is 103 days. 14 weeks. 2,472 hours to achieve all your goals by the end of the year.

This is my message to you, YOU CAN DO IT!!

 

”A goal without any action is just a dream.”

 

Stay Grounded X

How To Create Your Own Zen Space

Having a space full of clutter and mess is not a great thing to wake up or come home to. You tell yourself you will do it as soon as you’re finished with your other tasks and before you know it, you have an avalanche of clutter falling down on you ( slight exaggeration but you know what I mean). I am a firm believer that the space around you affects how you feel mentally. I know for me when my room is full of clutter, which usually consist of my handbags being thrown around the room and not in it’s designated place and my clothes not being tidied neatly away, I get very discombobulated. However, now that I have recognised the effects of when my place of zen is not tidy, I actively try to keep it as clutter free to avoid another avalanche. 

A great thing about a tidy space is that you can find everything in a matter of seconds. Imagine you have lost an important documents and your space is cluttered and messy and you need to find it; you’ll spend ages trying to remember where you last saw it. Whereas, if your room was free from all the clutter, it would be much easier.

Like a minimalist, everything that they need is in its rightful spot, this is something you want to incorporate in your place of zen.

TIPS:

• Add a few scented candles in your room- This helps release the serotonin in your body this chemical contributes  to your feel good hormone. The scented candles create a relaxed environment.

• Plants- I have recently discovered my new obsession with having plants in my room. Having plants in my room brightens up my day and allows me see the plant blossom through it’s grown.It has been proven talking positively to plants can rapidly improve their growth!

• Chill zone- Creating a space in the room where you can relax in a comfy chair creates an ambiance within your zen. I always sit in my bed and use my laptop, even though I have many other spaces in the room I can use but I started to realise I would become lazy and tend to have creative blocks. Now I’ve opt to sitting on the chair it has taken me out of the lethargic mood I was in and changed it into a positive more awake mode.

• Quotes-  Having quotes around the room is one of the ways to keep you focused and energised with your desires. I am the quotes queen!! Everywhere you look in my place of zen, there is a quote. Sometimes I just sit there and look at them and meditate for a few minutes about what the quotes says.

• Sage- I don’t know why I did not put this first but getting a real cleanse of the room, so new positive energy is invited into the room. This is a massive part in creating a positive vibe within a room. You can get different forms of sage from sage sticks to liquid cleansing mist( this is what I’m currently). They all work in the same way.

And remember a tidy zen is a tidy mind!

Stay Grounded X